Dating & Relationships Sexuality Vulnerability

I’m Calling You In: Holding each other accountable with compassion


College Room November 14, 2015 3:00 pm - 4:10 pm

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Karen B.K. Chan

We hurt each other sometimes, out of ignorance, carelessness, and/or oversight. Often, the offence is based in systemic injustice (racism, sexism, classism, ableism, transphobia, and so on).

“Calling out” is an empowered interuption of violence, and common in many progressive circles. It’s great because it demands accountabilty. But it also often involves humiliation and alienation, and ends up creating a culture of fear. While in pain and anguish, sometimes we imagine our allies and friends as enemies, it’s much easier to deal with the pain they cause us from there.

“Calling in” is another option. It demands accountability while keeping the offender close. It cultivates dialogue, patience, and compassion (when compassion is the hardest). It isn’t right for every situation, but when it is, it has great potential to heal hurts, increase understanding, change injustice, and deepen trust within communities.

Come explore the phenomenon, and practice the skills and scripts of calling each other in.

Presented by Polyamory Toronto